Monday, November 23, 2009

D.O.N.E.

On Thursday I will have been breastfeeding for 10 months. 10 rewarding, exhilarating, exhausting months.

My original goal was to breastfeed solidly for a year. I also wanted a completely natural childbirth, but plans change (hello, epidural!). Secretly, I was praying to make it to 9 months.

I have made the decision to stop pumping after we get home from vacation. At that point Isaac will be about 2 weeks shy of 11 months (gulp). I will only nurse him in the morning and at night. He will get one breastmilk bottle a day and one formula bottle. When the breastmilk runs out, he will be getting 2 formula bottles a day. At that point we will begin to phase in whole cow's milk.

I made this decision for a few reasons.

1. Isaac is about done with nursing. He is totally not interested in it during the day. He doesn't want to nurse for as long, he turns away and tries to sit up. He is much more interested in his food at mealtimes. Even if I tried to nurse him before his meals, he does the same thing. He is making it quite clear he is ready to move on.

2. I hate pumping. I do it for my baby, and that is the only thing that keeps me doing it: His little happy, full of food and content face. In the past month, my milk supply has started to diminish. When I came back to work, I had to pump 3 times per day. And my boobs told me I had to pump three times a day. Slowly that went from 3 to 2. I was still pumping 3 times a day at the beginning of November. I was trying to up the supply. And it worked. About 2 weeks ago, I went down to 2. That's pretty much when Isaac said "yeah, I am kinda over this, Mom. Where's my sippy cup?!" Now, I can skate by on just one pumping session.

3. This is completely selfish, but pumping has become inconvenient. Sigh. Yep. Work is busy, I have been in the field more often. Isaac and I have play dates, and I have more of a social life again. I have been taking classes and training. Lugging around Miss Medela is rough. And, Medela, while I appreciate the sleek design of your bags, you just can't glamorize pumping in the back seat of your car in a parking garage in the city. It is becoming harder and harder to find the opportunities to pump on days like that.

So yeah. Kinda done.

I am sad. I am excited for the next phase. I am slightly disappointed.

But I am mostly proud of myself and Isaac for making it this far.

4 comments:

My open roads said...

I totally know what you mean by the baby telling you he's kind of done with nursing, BB is starting to do the same, half of the nursing times he's moving around, trying to move his feet around while eating, moving his head to look around, etc... while totally enjoying his solids. But, you're so close to a year now, you're practically there. I remember reading somewhere that once the baby starts solids and eats more and more of it, breastmilk gets so diluted in their bellies that all the nutrition from it ends up being so insignificant when compared to what they get from the solids themselves... I'm hoping to go close to a year too, but we will see how it goes... I can only imagine how bittersweet it will be once I'm done too. :)

Grady Chronicles said...

You did such a great job!!!! It was so hard for me to accept that I needed to supplement, but our quality of life has improved significantly since!

Ummmm vacation countdown????

uncomplicateme said...

Don't be disappointed! You did a phenomenal job feeding him! I know it's bittersweet, but the freedom you get will soon replace any negative thoughts you have. I was mad at myself for only making it 5 months but I realized how much more independant B and I both felt after we dropped the boob. Thinking of you!

Nancy said...

Thanks so much for this post. I'm at almost 4 months of nursing, and while I plan to go on, I'm worried about transitioning back to work next month. It's good to hear from someone who has gone through it.