Sunday, May 29, 2011

Don't Know When I'll Be Back Again

We aren't leaving on a jet plane, per say, but we are leaving. And soon, which is very bittersweet.

It's been FOREVER since I posted. I have been so completely consumed with one task or another relating to the move.

We have sold two cars, paid off one, and purchased a brand new 2011 Equinox. It's a Mommy car, and I LOVE it. Isaac loves it. He has so much space. This is the car I will be driving across the country in the next month or so.

We (READ: I) have started sorting through things (READ: Piles of crap I have accumulated in the 8 years since we have lived in California) and started to give stuff away, sell things, throw stuff away. Seriously, we moved out here with almost nothing. How did we end up with so much stuff?! I also started packing up vestigial stuff we don't need on a day to day basis. Photo frames, magnets, books, CDs, knick knacks etc.

My replacement started at work. I am trying to get her to a good place before I leave. My last day of work is in two weeks, after which I need to put my packing game face on. I will have about one month to find a place for us to live and pack up.

I closed out bank accounts that there is no need to have anymore. Like the one the bank made us open when we got our car loan. It had $5 in it. My old Mary Kay accounts got closed as did my old SARP from Victoria's Secret. It was just a wierd investment account that wasn't making money or losing money. I was going to get hit with fees if I changed anything in the structure so I just closed it. Can we say "Blood Money"? Because that is what it was.

I have started scouting places to live in Ohio. We still don't have an exact location where my husband will be working but have narrowed it down to 2 or 3 towns where we are looking to live. That's all I want to say about that because it makes my blood pressure rise when I think about it.

I also started looking for daycares. We decided that it makes the most sense for Isaac to attend daycare in the town where my university is, in case he gets sick or whatnot. I hate daycare searches.

I started my last time list in California and SF. Pork Store, Cable Car, Muir Woods, Pier 39, etc. All needs visited one last time.

Which got me thinking about saying goodbye. To friends. And I can't think about that. When we left Ohio, I spent about 4 or 5 days crying all day after saying good bye to one person or another. It sucked. I can't do that again. It was too sad. And I am pretty sure it isn't healthy for Isaac to see. I want him to understand that we are doing something great for us, not sad. I mean, it is sad, but I just don't want him to think that something is horribly wrong when Mommy is crying all the time.

I came to the decision that as I see people, I just won't tell them it's the last time I will see them in a while. I can't do that again. I have a little over a month left and I am going to try to see all my friends at least once more. But that might not be possible. Big Sad Panda. :(  There are people out here that it breaks my heart to think about leaving. And we honestly don't know exactly when we will see these people again.

This decision is the best one for us and we are 100% positive of this. We are anxious to get back to family and friends in Ohio. We are excited at what the future holds for us in this next chapter of our lives. I am giddy at the thought of going back to school and back to research. But this next phase, before the's already proving to be a tough one.

Friday, May 6, 2011

Isaac's Room

This morning I looked out my bathroom window and saw that the fuschia rose bush was in full bloom. Behind that Cala lillies were blooming all over the yard, interwoven with California poppies and some unidentified purple flowers that Isaac picks. I don't pick the roses, only because I love smelling them in the morning when the window is open and I am getting ready for the day. This morning I realized that this would be the last season for me to do this and it gave me a twinge of sadness. This has been happening every now and then. Like when Isaac sits on his changing table and talks to me about the big apple tree outside his window. Or he sits on "his" rock and asks us to sit on the bigger one next to him.

I am sad to leave this house. Not because I love the house, because I DO NOT. It's a crazy Dr. Suess house that is full of earthquake hazards and issues. It never would have been a house we would have considered to buy, but has served it's purpose as a rental. I am sad to leave it because it is the first home Isaac has known. I know he won't remember living here. He probably won't remember the flowers, trees, rocks, or anything about it. But it was the house that I worked so hard to make a home to bring our new baby into.

Isaac's room is my favorite room in the entire house. Sometimes I just go in there and lay on his floor when he is in another room. I love his room. I don't really know why. I worked pretty hard to make it the way I wanted it, I guess. I am sad that he is leaving this room.

When I started thinking about what I wanted my baby's room to look like, I had a hard tiem settling on a theme. I am that type of person that if I chose one particular theme, like jungle animals or sports, the entire room woudl have to be that way and stay that way. I am just that Type A. I didn't want to do that. Ben and I decided on focusing on primary colors.

This is his wall of dogs. He loves dogs. I took some photos of dogs we know and had his fabulous photographer godmother send him some of all hers as well. I bought plain mats from Walmart for $2 and a pet stencil. White ribbon is hanging them to the wall. He also has a stackable dresser, meaning that each drawer section is a separate piece. VERY helpful when moving, because we just tie the drawers shut.
 I was told by many a person that these type of storage shelves are better for kids toys. They stay organized (in theory) and the child can see the toys without having to rifle through a huge box. Plus there's the whole not being able to slam his fingers in the lid thing. Since Isaac has always loved all things that GO!, I found this roadway rug at Ikea for like $10. The little cloth drawes beneath the bench hold smaller items and figures.

That's my little Peanut in the frame that I made while on maternity leave. We will look at after our bath, and now Isaac tells me "That's baby Isaac. He's cute!" and it makes my uterus ache.
All these characters need somethign to hold at night. Isaac likes alot of things in his crib, like his cup of  milk, he's Mickey Mouse light chaser, and more often than not he wants one or more racecars or trucks in the bed.

I think this Ohio State rocker is his Daddy's favorite thing in his room. He just started sitting in it to look at his books.

When we get a house in Ohio, I know I can make his room even better. I can PAINT for one thing. I just have a special attachment to this room. Nearly everything in the room was chosen specifically for my boo. It the first and only home he has every known, that we have known as a family. I hate the house. But I sure do love the home.

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

The Dirrty Thirty

I turned 30 on Sunday. 3-0. And I was really excited for this birthday. No freaking out, and no crisis needed averted. I am really really REALLY happy with where my life is and where it is going. And I was even happier about where I was going to be spending this milestone birthday. NYC!

My wonderful, amazing friends helped me to plan a fantastic weekend to celebrate my birthday. It was absolutely PERFECT and I would not have changed a moment (except maybe Rob Thomas could have made an appearance in there at Starbucks. Or a bar. Or anywhere).

Karen, Gail, and I left on Friday, and flew out of the brand new terminal at SFO. The flights were easy and filled with Royal Wedding coverage, SATC reruns, and inflight cocktails.Although our cabbie was steroetypical NYC with his lack of deoderant and crazy Nascar manuevers, we made it to our Midtown hotel just in time for another ddrink with the fabulous Kelly, who had made the trek on THE CHINA BUS from her home. Afterward, our stomaches sent us in search of nourishment which we found in the form of pizza, cookies, and prosecco. We also discovered that you can buy perfume that is the scent of a funerla home and dirt. Not together. But those are the actual names of the fragrances.

On Saturday we ate delicous pizza from Patsy's Pizza.

Then we ventured into the park to cross off one of my NYC bucket list items: rowing boats around the lake in Central Park. Kelly, the rockstar rower, easily navigated us around. Other tourists were not so adept and let's just say that my sweater smelled like dirty lake water for the rest of the day. It was a gorgeous day, with the sun shining and the smell of blossoms lingering all over the park, which we got to enjoy after our trip around the lake.

One of the highlights from the entire weekend was that I got to have my first blogger meetup! My blogging bestie Made a trip into the City and met up with us in the park. It was amzing to finally meet her, especially since I feel like I have known her for well over 2 years. Together, we all went to Dylan's Candy Store, where I purchased some treats for Isaac, and one deliciously chocolate one for myself. All homes should have a chocolate fountain as a standard kitchen fixture, don't you think?  

After that, we headed into Serendipity to cross another item off my list: The marvelous frozen hot chocolate, which I split with Gail.

To work off our sugar intake, we headed back to the park for a carriage ride.

For dinner we met up with my cousin Bethany and her boyfriend for a fabulous Italian dinner. Afterward, we headed to a piano bar called The Rum House for birthday drinks in Times Square. The beverages were awesome. The crazy Canadian man there for a stag party who kept volunteering to remove his pants was not, prompting us to leave after two drinks. We meandered around the square for a bit and ate street vendor hot dogs. I know the stigma they carry, but seriously...oh so very good.

Sunday morning, we awoke bright and early for some serious Canal Street shopping, which we indulged ourselves in for a few hours until we had to return for lunch and to dress for the theatre. We got all dolled up for "The Lion King" which was absolutely amazing. There is no way to accurately describe the show.

Afterward, we headed to the Plaza hotel for pre-dinner cocktails (another list item). We all partook in the delicious specialty drink, the "Bradshaw" inspired by the SATC star. Although it was a $22 cocktail, it was worth every single penny. Talk about mixed perfection!
We walked back up the park to our dinner reservation at TBar Steakhouse, where we had a wonderful dinner. Afterward we headed back to Serendipity for a celebratory dessert...or three.

Monday morning, after a small yet still startling accidently detour through Harlem, we got breakfast at Alice's Teacup, which fit Karen to a T! Wonderful food, yet again. Is it possible to get bad food in New York?!

Our last stop on this incredible trip was to the New York Public Library, where we saw where the SATC wedding never took place, and the original toys that inspired the "Winnie the Pooh" stories. The library was beautiful.
The trip home was spent sleeping and updating ourselves on the new wordly happenings as we were in our own little NYC birthday bubble for theweekend. I could not have asked for a better birthday. I missed my baby boo and my husband of course, but I needed to get away. I needed a breather and a chance to refresh and recharge, which is exactly what I got to do. I was happy to be home with my husband and little Boo.

Although I am not exactly where I pictured myself to be when I thought about my life at 30, I am someplace better. My friends and family all over the country made my birthday so special and created so many memories for me to carry into this next stage of my life. I am so blessed with beautiful and loving people in my life.