Monday, December 21, 2009

Ache

I got spoiled.

For two weeks, I was with my baby almost all day, everyday. I haven't had that since maternity leave. It was absolutely WONDERFUL. We played, we took naps, we tried new foods, we did Christmas type things....

And then I went back to work and things got busy. Work is jammed packed everyday up to Christmas Eve. Oh yeah, and it's Christmas, so that automatically means everyone is on edge and stressed out and feel the need to pack ten million things to do into 24 hour days, myself included. Every year, I try to space things out and plan, plan, plan so I don't feel the stress and anxiety shoot up, but only the happy hustle and bustle. It just never seems to work. Last week was not so fun. I had something that needed to get done almost every single night during the week...a haircut, the ballet, a trip to Wal.mart...and I worked all 5 weekdays, last week.

I missed my baby. I just wanted to cuddle up on the couch with my boy and enjoy the holiday. But there just was not time. I know, I know. Make time, right? I do too much and blah, blah, blah.

I have to work. And I have to get presents sent off. And trust me, I majorly cut back on everything this year.

I missed Isaac so much, it ached. And sitting on the couch, listening to him cry it out in his crib just seemed unfair and wrong to both of us, and made me cry. I cheated a little bit, and cuddle him in his room for a few minutes.

He is still down to 10 minutes of crying so, it didn't hurt, right?

So thankfully, with the exception of a teeth cleaning that I have to get in before the end of the year for insurance purposes (don't eve get me started on the evils of dentists). I am able to enjoy this week with my baby. It's his first Christmas. I know he won't remember it, but I will.