Black Friday Virgin

Since I have had a week to recover (READ: DRINK) I can now retell how I lost my Black Friday virginity. I suppose I could say I was a newbie, but this is was a violating experience. There is no other appropriate way.

For some unknown reason I decided that I was going to go Black Friday Shopping for the first time this year. Alone. AT WALMART. Oh wait, it gets better...I WANTED LEGO DUPLOS. I had attempted to go to Toys R Us last year in California with a neighbor, but when we got there, the line was wrapped around the entire building, twice. Yeah, not so much. We drove home and I curled up with my laptop and leftover turkey in my pj pants. This year, we have a tight Christmas budget. I wanted to stretch it as far as possible.

I left Isaac with Ben, at his parents' house and drove back to our local Walmart. I had changed into my sneakers and my hair was in a ponytail. I had my GAME FACE ON. It was a little past 8. I got a rock start parking spot close to the doors. I played on my iPhone for a bit, and noticed an increase of people walking into the store. At 8:10. I figured I could go in and walk around, since I needed things that weren't on crazy sales, like dogfood, shampoo...etc.Upon entering the store, I noticed no one was wearing a coat or a purse. Because clearly purses are for sissies. I returned to my car to drop off said items. I BARELY GOT A CART.

I decided to scope out the layout to see where the things that I wanted were located (side note: I had to run to Walmart the night before because we were out of coffee.). All the specials were on pallets, and shrink wrapped with signs saying they weren't available until 10 pm. I wanted to see where my pallets were. Oh, and they were handing out MAPS. MAPS OF PALLETS IN WALMART.

By 8:30 I could barely maneuver down the aisles. There were people camped out EVERYWHERE, waiting for the electronics to go on sale AT MIDNIGHT. The megaminds of the Black Friday sale had at least had the forethought to disperse said electronics and gaming systems throughout the store and not cluster them in their proper department. Apparently people had been waiting for the XBox for like, 7 hours or something. These people must hate turkey. And pie. And in my mind those people do NOT deserve an XBox. That's like anti-American or something.

I fought my way BACK to the toy section where the pallet of Legos was sandwiched between some weird rocking horse things and Disney princess dress up trunks. There were more people there than had been when I first passed the area. I camped out right in front of the pallet, pushing my cart against an aisle shelf. I quickly made friends with another Lego stalker, I mean, shopper. I don't know her name. But I know she wanted one  red carton of legos. I wanted the green. It was 8:45.

By 9, my new BFF was like, laying on the Lego pallet. I was guarding the carts. She was hardcore. A beast. The hardcore beast of Legos. I am pretty sure every toy has one.

By 9:30, my phone was ready to die. That was probably the most active I have ever been on Twitter in a short amount of time since my maternity leave (killing time waiting for Legos...killing time waiting for the next feeding...SAME). I had texted all about my new BFF and how I was pretty sure that I wouldn't make it out of  Walmart alive. I was one tiny person. I told Ben to tell Isaac that Mommy loved him and TO MAKE SURE HE GOT HIS LEGOS SO I DIDN'T DIE IN VAIN. It's like he didn't take me seriously though, because he didn't respond to that text. WHATEVS.

About 9:45 the banging and thuds started. There were a few screams. There were cops roaming around. And I am pretty sure the Walmart workers were packing some heat or at least bear mace. DAMMIT I WAS DETERMINED TO GET THE LEGOS. I HAD WAITED THIS LONG.

I had also made another friend to told me that it was like Walmart was trying to start riots. Last year, you could put stuff into your cart, you just couldn't check out until after 10pm. FLAW IN THE SYSTEM.

I was edging my way closer to BFF1 because apparently people didn't understand THERE WAS A PECKING ORDER HERE AND NO CUTSIES!

At about 9:55pm the shrink wrap was flying. So were the Legos. I GOT MINE! AND I PASSED A SET TO BFF2 with the help of BFF1.

Somehow I managed to get back to my cart and semi-navigate through the throngs of crazies...I mean shoppers. I managed to get everything on my list but the iPad cover. I wasn't brave enough to try to go through the electronics sections. By the time I made it to the $1.96 movies, there were like 5 left. COME TO REALIZE THESE MOVIES ARE ONLY $5 regularly. NOT WORTH A FINGER OR ARM PEOPLE.

I was out of Walmart by 10:20 with 4 sets of pjs, THE LEGOS!, a play doh set, 3 games, and table and chair set you could write all over and erase or something.

It took about 2 and half hours and 20 years off my life. But I am pretty sure I will go back next year.

MAYBE. Only if there are Legos.

Gobble Gobble

For the past eight years, I have taken on the task of preparing Thanksgiving dinner for my husband and whomever else needed a place to go. Often it was my BIL, cousins, or friends. I remember that realizing that I couldn't go home for Thanksgiving meant that we truly no longer lived at home and it was time to start making our own memories. And we did.

I remember that first Thanksgiving, how scared I was that I was going to mess it up. I remember scouring the internet for recipes and shopping at the Farmers' Market (Oooooooohhhhh how I miss the CA Farmers' Markets....). I remember calling my future mother in law, asking for her sweet potato recipe. I remember cooking for 2 days straight and then having over some of the best friends I could have ever made in California. After dinner we walked up the street to the top of the hill on Euclid, and looked down at the lights of San Francisco. I couldn't believe that we lived in this beautiful city, or for that matter that we were walking around at night in November without coats on.

I remember preparing a plate of food, pie, and hot drink and putting on the homeless man's cart and bags that lived in the stoop of an abandoned building. I never met him, but I hoped he got the food.

I remember taking an after dinner drive through Sea Cliff and showing a friend where Robin Williams lives. And then seeing Robin Williams standing outside his house. It was one of my only celebrity sightings in California. My husband had more.NOT FAIR.

I remember the 32lb turkey that I had to make to feed the Lahman twins and the Spiess twins.

I remember learning how to make the best after Thanksgiving sandwiches from "Friends" complete with moist maker. DON'T KNOCK IT.

I remember finding my own footing, and not needing recipes anymore. I remember learning to flip the turkey upside down to cook it so all the juices stay in the breasts.

I remember the first Thanksgiving we were a family with Isaac. He loved the green bean casserole and pumpkin pie.

I remember last Thanksgiving, it was the first and last one that we would have just the three of us. It was quiet. It was nice. It was relieving and bittersweet, knowing that the next year I would not need to cook a full meal, merely a side dish or pie.

And that's what I did. This year past weekend was Isaac's first major holiday with his extended family. We were all so happy. We had a great dinner with my family and then a second dinner yesterday with Ben's. We had two amazing meals with our amazing families. We made memories of this, and had time to reflect on the ones we brought from California.

This Thanksgiving we saw what we appreciated and what we are truly thankful for, and that is being back home with our family.

It's a Funny Thing, Time

The last time I was in graduate school, I was working 30+ hours a week at VS, taking a full class load, teaching 2 lab sections of undergrad intro bio, conducting my research and writing my thesis. I was also planning my wedding that was taking place across the country, and maintaining a home, albeit small. My planner WAS COLOR CODED. I never missed a deadline or paid a bill late. I was caught up on my TV shows, I cooked and cleaned, and I blogged. I also had time to spend with friends. I am pretty sure I was a MACHINE.

This time...well, everything is completely.

I'm teaching. I'm taking a full class load. I'm planning out my dissertation. The academic part is still there.

My priorities have shifted. And I have realized that things that used to be important...they really just aren't anymore. Spending an extra hour on a paper as opposed to doing puzzles with Isaac? Not a hard choice. I still want to do the best I can do. But an A on a quiz just seems so petty next to watching a movie with Boo and tickling him. It boils down to this...I COULD spend extra time on school stuff. I could spend every waking minute possible on campus. I could read into the night.

But at this moment in time, that all seems trivial. There are better uses of my time. I don't care if I am the best anymore. I want to be the best mother, the best wife that I can be. I know I am a good student. I'm a great one. I know how to learn. I know how to study. I know to teach myself what people want me to. This is my 3rd post-secondary degree. I got this. That undergrad and Master's student mind frame has dissipated and only relics remain.

Time has changed me. My time is valuable. My time with Isaac is more precious than any degree could ever  be. This PhD...it's already teaching me more about myself than I ever thought it would.

Mom Fail

Wednesday is my favorite morning of the week. I don't have to be on campus until I teach at 10:30, so I let Isaac sleep in and enjoy his morning. Plus I get to sleep in until 7:30. That's saying something right there.

Anyway, this morning started off wonderfully. I checked my email to discover that my parking citation had been repealed, saving me $25. Isaac woke up happy and ate his breakfast, which he chose: a strawberry poptart. He got willingly into the car, which is saying something. He was on his second poptart when I strapped him into his seat.

We get to his school, and I notice a sign that had not been there when I picked him up on Monday. It was a reminder that Christmas pictures were being taken for the school. IT WAS PHOTO DAY. I looked at Isaac, in his play clothes which were clean and nice, but not my first choice for a photo. He hadn't had a haircut in months, and was looking a bit shaggy AND he had poptart all over his face. I took in the Christmas sleigh and wintery background. SIGH.

The sign said that the photographer had been there since 8 am. It was almost 10, meaning they were getting ready to pack up. I had no time to run home and get new clothes. Isaac looked pretty confused as I frantically wiped poptart from his face and tried to smooth his hair into place.  He doesn't go to daycare on Tuesdays, which is when I am guessing they gave notice of the photographer.

I'm not sure if he actually got a photo taken or not. He hates getting his photo taken, and family photos are a nightmare.

I felt guilty. I felt that nagging Mom-guilt. I know it was stupid, and not really my fault, but it was still there. I don't like letting my son down. This semester has been hard on him, and has been full of big adjustments. He's my world and I hate that feeling. :(

Musings from the Week or the Weak...However you prefer to see it.

As Saturday evening descends on my house, the weekend is really just beginning. Today was the first day of potty training boot camp that I mentioned yesterday. It has been...interesting to say the least. We are 5 pairs of Thomas the Tank Engine undies in, one load of pee soaked laundry down, 2 prize candy bars given....and I can't tell if progress has been made or not. 

I have been prepping Isaac for this. We have been talking about his "big boy" underpants and going in the potty all week. He was excited to show Nonnie his undies. However, this morning he woke up with grumpy pants on. I tried to change them. He had peed through his pjs AGAIN, and he hates that. He hates pee in his bed. But...he would not put on his underwear. He screamed for a diaper. SCREAMED. I finally gave in and put a pull up on him. He watched a movie, and after awhile, he seemed in better spirits. 

I got the undies on him. We started a puzzle. And then....

"I'M ALL WET!" 

Yep, that was the first pair. However, it was more of a Mom, my pants are wet I need you to change me type  exclamation. He wasn't really bothered by it. No idea why. 

It's been that way all day. I put another pull up on him for naptime. He's been asleep for 2 hours now. He's exhausted. I'm exhausted. All we have been doing all day is changing clothes. 

Maybe I was wrong. Maybe this is too soon. Maybe he isn't as ready as I thought. 

Or maybe I am being weak. Maybe I am just trying to hold onto my baby for a bit longer. As much as I hate buying diapers, if it means he's still my little baby for just a few more days...well, you know. That doesn't make sense unless you are a mother who is far away from having another baby. 

This week itself has been exhausting. Emotionally. Physically. Mentally. 

So many things that I want, that Ben and I want, are so close to our grasp, yet so far away. It seems like there are always challenges. And I am not one to shy from a challenge. I like challenge. But at the same time, I have enough of it. I just want one thing to come easily because I, we, have worked so hard to get through other challenges. 

You know, like the prize candy bar you get for finally peeing in the potty.

Boot Camp

This weekend is Boot Camp at my house. Not the physical kind, cause Lord knows I don't run (unless someone with a machete is chasing me). I am talking about Isaac's Potty Training Boot Camp.

I have heard from multiple mommies that this is the way to go. Isaac is so close, that I am hoping this weekend will cinch it for him.

The undies with Thomas the Tank Engine and Mickey Mouse have been bought. The waterproof crib liners are ready to be put on the furniture. There is a bucket of small prizes sitting by the potty.

Starting tomorrow morning, Isaac will wear underwear all day. Apparently the wet feeling of peeing yourself does the trick and will send him to the bathroom. I am really really REALLY hoping this does it. I am tired of buying diapers. He goes potty at school and at both his grandma's houses. Just not for me. I already have to clean up Luna's bathroom mishaps. I am kind of over changing the diapers too, when I know Isaac knows how to use the potty.

Fingers crossed that by Sunday night I will have a story of victory and not just a house that smells like urine.

To the Extreme

So...I have a tiny confession to make. I'm kind of an extreme couponer.

Let me give you a little background before you stamp me as a hoarder. Because I really am not. No, seriously. I am not.

It started in California, among the chaos of organizing a massive cross country move...etc. I saw the TLC show. I was intrigued. I'm good a math. I am good at shopping. And the impending price tags on the move and salary cuts we were about to make prompted me to really think this through. My husband was about to take a 60% pay cut and I was essentially doing the same. We were moving to an area where the cost of living is most certainly lower, but so are the salaries. I was saving money like a squirrel hiding acorns for winter.

I started buying the Sunday paper and printing coupons online. The first big trip I planned....I saved over 73%. In CALIFORNIA WITHOUT DOUBLE COUPONS. That was it for me. I was hooked. I had and have no intentions of having 30k stockpiles in my house, but I see no reason that I cannot get my groceries for rock bottom prices or for free. I free. If anyone says they won't take something that is for free, they are a LIAR.

After the move, our food budget was sliced in half. And then sliced again once we actually figured out how much (or how little) money we were going to bringing in for the first year of grad school after a 12k move (yes it was $12,000 by the time all was said and done, most of it paid in cash thank you very much!). I did a few smaller trips, saving about 45-55%. And then I really got into the swing of it.

I get the Sunday paper, and so does my grandma...and so does my mom. They save the coupons for me. And my once skeptical husband who watches me leave the house with $50 and come home with almost $300 in groceries saves inserts from his job for me (they are closed on Sunday but the paper is there on Monday morning when he comes into work).

You know what? It's not hard. Once you clip the coupons for stuff you use and have them saved, all you do is wait for it to go on sale. I am pretty sure (or at least I hope) everyone uses detergent and toilet paper and juice. And you know what? You can get those for free. WITHOUT STEALING.

Examples? 2 weeks ago, my grocery store was having a buy 10 for $10 and get an 11th item free sale. And it was mix and match. They also double coupons. One of the products was Angel Soft bathroom tissue. It was $1. I had a coupon for $0.50 of any size that the store doubles. Actually I had 4. I got 16 free rolls of toilet paper. Also included in the sale were those scalloped potatoes that Isaac loves. I had a coupon for 0.50 off 2, and a store coupon for the same. My coupon (I actually had 3) doubled. So I got 6. 6 boxes of potatoes that normally cost me about $2 a piece, I got for $2.50 total. And that was 10 items. So I got an 11th item for free. It got about 4 groups of products like this.

Another example: Isaac's shampoo was on sale for 3/$5. I had 2 Buy one get one free coupons. So I got 4. And then I had 2 0.50 coupons off 2 that doubled to $1 each. That ended up making 2 shampoos that normally cost $1.98 each about $0.34 each.

I haven't bought 300 candy bars or 600 gatorades. I buy stuff that we use, and the saving allow me to buy healthy things as well. I am able to stretch out our budget as much as possible. I am buy meat in bulk and freeze it in our deep freezer. I have built up a great stockpile that will get us through a few months without buying anything but milk and bread.

I don't just coupon with groceries. I just got a winter coat on sale, from $138.00 marked down to $78. With a 20% off coupon and $20 giftcard, I spent about $40 on the coat when all was said and shipped.

Sooooo...yeah. I'm a couponer. I'm good at it. I am going to keep doing it. Not to hoard, but to balance out our dip in income without sacrificing our eating habits.

(I realize that I have been MIA from the blogosphere for the past month....I am still trying to find my new balance. I am NOT spending every spare second couponing. I have a plan to get back to this space.)